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April 26, 2004

Filed under: Uncategorized — katy @ 5:16 pm

Rough days around here. I think I have written before that Owen was waking up early. He slept through last night. I didn’t though, just waiting for him to wake up. Don’t you hate when that happens? He is going through some thing right now that is driving me nuts. He won’t put his hands flat, they are permanently clenched. Holding a cup, eating a bagel…everything. I know when I am tense, I often find my hands clenched. Could that be the cause? I don’t know. There is so much I don’t know and it just destroys me sometimes. We have also seen an increase in self-injurious behaviors again. Is it the time change–still? Or environmental allergies? I feel so helpless. He seems so unrelated these days. So lost. I wonder where he is. Will he come back anytime soon?

April is Autism Awareness month. There has been a lot of programs on television about autism, on the news. I wish I knew more. Will I ever know enough? Perhaps it is time to dig up his old Mission Falls sweater and knit a prayer into it for his well-being, for his happiness. For him to find his way back to me again.



7 Responses to “”

  1. Anita Says:

    You and Owen are in my prayers and thoughts!

  2. Anita Says:

    You and Owen are in my prayers and thoughts!

  3. ann Says:

    Like Anita, I will be thinking of you too. perhaps the sleeping through is a good sign?

  4. Vicki Says:

    Know that while you knit that prayer into Owen’s Mission Falls sweater, you’ll also be knitting in countless prayers and well wishes from your friends.

  5. Renada Says:

    I think that everything I knit, especially the PF Cradifan has countless prayers. I’ll add you and your family to my Peace Fleece.

  6. godsend Says:

    My prayers go out to you and Owen.

  7. Laurie Says:

    Ever since my William was young there have been times when he seems so “with” us and times when he seems far away. I thought for awhile that it was related to what he ate, almost like food allergies–depending on what he ate, he was more integrated into our social fabric, or not.

    For awhile, I tried to keep track of what he ate and then tried to figure out if he was different based on his eating habits. Not too tough, really, since he ate about four things. I also prayed to God that it wasn’t the peanut butter, because then what would he eat?

    But my theory didn’t pan out, so I decided it probably wasn’t something I was going to be able to pin down.

    He’s nearly sixteen now, and it’s still like that, though the periods of with us/not with us fluctuate more quickly. My heart goes out to you, Katy. Keep the faith.

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